Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Randomize
