Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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