you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
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