ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
