I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
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I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
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I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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