Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
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