I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
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