Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
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