woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I will be naked everywhere
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize