I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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