Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
The struggles of a small town man whore
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
