Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
