Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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