Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
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