Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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