yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
