I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
whose ass print is on the piano?
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
