your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
why do cheetos always look like penises
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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