dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Randomize