He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
