38 yer olds are good kisserssss
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize