He had one of those small greek statue penises
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
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