so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
