Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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