He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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