you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
