last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Best friends brother. Beat that.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
