Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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