Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
