Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
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