Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
