some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Randomize