So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
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I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
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Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
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