did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize