Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(912): View more from Georgia

I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.

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(912): I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night. http://tfl.nu/zcqt

Replies (22) Good night (3162) Bad night (872)
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(219): View more from Indiana

community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.

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(219): community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal. http://tfl.nu/j3ch

Replies (14) Good night (3109) Bad night (751)
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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.

(1-902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

the hells wrong with u

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(902): bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard. (1-902): the hells wrong with u http://tfl.nu/fwtj

Replies (17) Good night (1870) Bad night (3829)
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(757): View more from Virginia

high people should be assigned attendants

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(757): high people should be assigned attendants http://tfl.nu/w28j

Replies (14) Good night (4102) Bad night (689)
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(124): View more from

Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.

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(124): Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all. http://tfl.nu/q25u

Replies (107) Good night (31996) Bad night (1497)
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(216): View more from Ohio

I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.

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(216): I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous. http://tfl.nu/a664

Replies (22) Good night (4366) Bad night (629)
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(920): View more from Wisconsin

you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'

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(920): you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!' http://tfl.nu/st5y

Replies (23) Good night (3207) Bad night (3965)
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(778): View more from British Columbia

You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it

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(778): You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it http://tfl.nu/gf74

Replies (7) Good night (4160) Bad night (1419)
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(631): View more from New York

You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.

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(631): You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it. http://tfl.nu/dj6o

Replies (19) Good night (2244) Bad night (6617)
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(404): View more from Georgia

Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.

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(404): Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center. http://tfl.nu/it0q

Replies (18) Good night (955) Bad night (4401)
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(61): View more from Australia

Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.

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(61): Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above. http://tfl.nu/o1v2

Replies (5) Good night (851) Bad night (2260)
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(480): View more from Arizona

I would never do this in real life. It's only college.

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(480): I would never do this in real life. It's only college. http://tfl.nu/l8vq

Replies (4) Good night (2799) Bad night (932)
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(989): View more from Michigan

He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.

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(989): He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT. http://tfl.nu/p01t

Replies (8) Good night (666) Bad night (2017)
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(719): View more from Colorado

Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.

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(719): Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up. http://tfl.nu/uyof

Replies (5) Good night (1449) Bad night (403)
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(360): View more from Washington

Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success

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(360): Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success http://tfl.nu/t5af

Replies (3) Good night (642) Bad night (304)

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