How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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