he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize