TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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