therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
