Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
I believe in your delicious
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
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