Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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