I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
I wish you could order shots online.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
