I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Randomize
