D3 body, D1 cock
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
