hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Randomize
