Your face is a jimmy john
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
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