Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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