Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
Someone shattered a urinal.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
