After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
