Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
