that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
