New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
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