My hand turned me down
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
he fucked my hip out of place.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
